Masculine Frame
What is a masculine frame?
A frame enables you to hold your centre; to know your worth, boundaries and values. When you peruse your interests, hobbies, dreams and life’s work you are creating your frame. Everything else must exist within this frame. You are making yourself the priority.
A frame is moving from co-dependency to inter-dependency. No one will care for you as much as you can care for yourself. Relationships can come and go. Employers can fire and hire. Friendships wax and wane. When this happens in life, your strength and core are being tested. This is an opportunity to fall back into your frame. To refocus on it, to tone and tighten it; knowing your boundaries and values will build a strong core.
1. Foundation – Holding your inner child
In my experience, this can’t be skipped. Deeper work is the gateway to long term changes. Part of creating a strong frame, is knowing you can always feel it’s presence when life is challenging.
Example:
If you get triggered in relationship, you could have a little check-in with yourself to see if it’s a younger part of you acting up. If that is true, you could invite a more mature part of yourself to hold space. Ask yourself, what is it that I need right now?
Do I need to rest or sleep?
Do I need to get out in the sun?
Do I need to wrap my arms around myself and give myself a big hug?
This is much harder than it sounds when the moment comes.
2. Expression - Boundaries, Integrity and Values
The next step in getting to know your frame is learning your boundaries. All those times you said “yes”, when really you felt “no”.
Where in your life are you playing small, and not asking for your own needs first.
A part of learning boundaries is knowing that you are priority. If you don’t thrive, you can’t help anyone else from a centred place. When you are out of alignment with boundaries, you are also out of integrity and not living up to your values.
Starting to learn the subtle energies within your own emotional field takes practice, but once you get the hang of it you will create a stronger frame for yourself.
3. Action - Pursuing your hobbies
Figure out what your hobbies, interests and passions are that make life more fun and worth living. Invest and pursue these passions, trusting they will fuel other areas of your life.
Like everything in life, the hobbies change shape and form as you grow. I strongly encourage you to play and try different things. Some passions might stick for a long time, and some might just stay for a little while, others might come and go in cycles. Accepting this is another part of embodiment.
4. Refinement - Learning new skills
Learning new skills is the fruit of pursuing your hobbies.
There is nothing more rewarding than challenging your comfort zone and learning new skills. Spend some time everyday intentionally learning something new.
5. Embodiment - Living your life’s purpose
For many men this is a big question. What am I here to do? For ten years I was pondering this quest. When I felt out of alignment with my life purpose, there was a heavy feeling within me. I knew something was missing. Something was out of alignment.
This definitely left me out of alignment with my masculine frame. What I can tell you from my experience is that you already know your path. You know your purpose. You might feel called for a vision quest, or a plant medicine journey to figure it out, but I know that when you pursue these steps and when you start putting yourself first you start practising embodiment by default.
When pursuing your hobbies, interests and learning new skills, you are living your life’s purpose. The path of embodiment and embodying a strong masculine frame will put you in the shoes of a man that is living his life purpose. It will all unfold from there. Trust that the heart will guide you on the right path. Build a life you are proud of.
Disclaimer!
Like a pendulum swinging from one side to the other, it can be easy to go from being a pleaser in life, to the other extreme. The key word here is centre.
Blessings!